Smile, laugh and consider ....

“Yesterday I adopted the oldest, sickest and most injured dog from a shelter. I will never forget his eyes, when I entered the cages he didn't even bother to look at me, like he knew that I wouldn't even see him, curled up in a corner, accepted his fate. The volunteer told me several times... But are you sure about that? Are you sure about this? Yes!!! I want this dog, he opened the cage, I ran to him, suddenly he looked me as if I saw an angel... I took him in my arms and told him...

Now you will be happy to. He fell asleep in my arms... Probably the first peaceful sleep he'd had in a long time. Give it a life. Kiss an old man. They need us..."*

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A ventriloquist is traveling through Oklahoma when his car overheats. He pulls over to the side of the road and sees a farmer out plowing his field and decided to have a little fun with this good ol boy. So the ventriloquist walks over and yells over the sound of the tractor” “ hey mister, ya got a minute”? the farmer shuts down his tractor and says “ sure son, what ya need”?

The ventriloquist says “did ya know that your cow can talk”? the farmer says “mister your crazy, that cow can't talk”.

The ventriloquist says, watch this and throws his voice and the cow goes” I love life out here on the farm , I always have so much to eat” and the farmer goes “ damnit my cow can talk “ !! the ventriloquist then says, “mister did ya know that your pig over there can talk”? “

The farmer replies, “ mister I've had that pig seven years now, ain't never said word one!!” The ventriloquist says watch this,”and throws his voice again and the pig goes “ I hate life out here on the farm my pig sty is always so filthy “.. the farmer replies“ damnit my pig can talk too”.

Then the ventriloquist goes “mister did you know that your sheep over there can talk“? And the farmer goes

” mister, don't you believe a word that whore says, “she was a born liar,” !!

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A Winchester woman driving along at speed passed over a bridge only to find a cop with a radar gun on the other side lying in wait. The cop pulled her over, walked up to the car, with that classic patronizing smirk & asked, 'What's your hurry?'

She replied, 'I'm late for work.'

'Oh yeah,' said the cop, 'what do you do?'

'I'm a Rectum Stretcher,' she responded.

The cop stammered, 'A what?'

'A Rectum Stretcher!'

'And just what does a rectum stretcher do?'

'Well,' she said, 'I start by inserting one finger in the rectum, then work my way up to two fingers, then three, then four, then with my whole hand in I work from side to side until I can get both hands in, and then I slowly but surely stretch it, until it's about 6 feet' Read More

'And just what the hell do you do with a 6 foot arsehole?' he asked.

'You give him a radar gun & park him behind a bridge.'

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Do you believe Elon Musk is a good person?

No, and an anecdote explains why.

A young woman I’ve known since she was very young got a job as a waitress at an upscale restaurant to help pay for college. One night, Musk and his party bought out the whole restaurant for a private dinner. This wasn’t unusual for the very rich, since dining around other people without being disturbed is almost impossible for them.

She was one of the waitstaff assigned that night, and all any of them had to do was stand around discreetly away from the table and watch for any need Musk and any of his guests might have. This meant that any of them could simply glance over at any of the staff and almost instantly receive immediate attention.

But that’s not what happened. Instead, Musk would tilt his head back and bray at the ceiling, “Water!” or “Salt!” Or for whatever else he wanted.

People who treat other people like things are not good people. Not ever.

( I wonder if he left a tip or stiffed the waitress after being a rude asshole. )

At the age of 19, he found himself in prison, accused of infiltrating the American secret service and stealing many of the country's secrets.

His father was an elderly man who lived alone. One day he wanted to plant potatoes in his garden, but he did not have the strength because of his advanced age.

Then he sent a message to his imprisoned son, which said

'My dear son, I wish you were with me right now to help me plow the garden and plant these potatoes. Now I have no one to help me.'

After some time, the father received a letter from his son saying

'Dad, please don't dig in the garden because I hid something important, and when I get out of prison, I'll tell you what it is.'

Within an hour of the message, the secret service and the army surrounded the house.

They dug the earth meter by meter, removed everything, but found nothing and left the house.

A week later, the father received another letter.

'Dad, I hope the land has been well plowed by the police, now you can plant potatoes and if you need anything else, let me know. I can't be with you, but I will do my best to support you in any way I can.'

I especially like this one below

If Ukraine goes to France & Britain to broker a peace deal with Russia, would that upset President Trump?

Yeah, Trump would be furious.

Ask me if I care…

I hope the European leaders do arrange a deal.

Trump and his toadie, Vance, need to be “schooled” in front of the entire world. They, (and more importantly, the Americans who voted for Trump), need to see what it looks like when experienced veterans in international relations get to work.

Starmer and Macron demonstrating how “professionals” do the job.

Trump believes he’s an expert deal-maker, but he’s little more than a two-bit con man, a flim-flam man, who relied on Daddy’s money to support his childish fumbling. Be advised, Trump went bankrupt…six times! A man like that shouldn’t have a job counting paperclips, much less running the security of a nation.

So, when the UK, France, Poland, Sweden, Norway, Finland, Spain, et al, get access to Ukraine’s minerals (because they offered a sincere deal that Ukraine could live with) when Trump failed, Trump voters need to realize they backed the wrong horse.