No-one even knows you are there.

In December 2003, Joyce Vincent died of an apparent asthma attack in her North London flat.

The television remained on.

The mail continued to be delivered. Her rent was set to be automatically deducted from her bank account. Days passed and no one noticed she had died.

Those days turned into weeks and the weeks into months. There were large bins on the side of the building next to her flat, so the neighbours never gave much thought to the foul odor they could smell. The block was full of noisy children and teenagers and no one questioned the constant hum of the TV noise in the background.

Eventually, Joyce's bank account ran dry. Her landlord sent her letters of demand. These, like the others, simply fell into the mix on her floor. They received no reply. Finally, with more than six months of back rent, the landlord obtained a court order to forcibly remove her from the premises.

The bailiffs broke down the door and only then was her body discovered. At that point, it was January 2006, more than two years after her death.

In all this time, no one ever came looking for Joyce Vincent. No family, no friends, no colleagues, no neighbors who knocked on the door to see if everything was okay. No one called. She was 38 years old when she died.

This story is surprising for its social implications. It seems incomprehensible that entire years pass without anyone noticing the death of a person. However, these types of stories happen frequently. Chances are, you have seen a story similar to that of Joyce Vincent. And they are all the same.

A person lives alone.

They lose contact with family and friends.

They never know their neighbors.

They stay locked up with the television or computer on for years.

The world goes on as if they were no longer there until one day they are no longer there.

And the bad thing is that no one notices...

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John Bellamy Comments:

Do we live in a society that does not care ?

Do we live for ourselves and fuck anyone else ?

Do we show friendship and attention to our neighbours ?

Or are we a load of selfish people who don't give a damn ?

Do YOU know your neighbours - especially old and frail neighbours ?

Or is it all about you all the time ?

I lived in a flat in a terrace house in Hammersmith back in the late 1980's.

Next door, on the front step almost every day was this elderly women who would ask anyone passing -

' What time is it dear ?'

and within minutes she would be asking the same to anyone who passed.

I would stop and talk but did not really take the time to find out what was going on with her as - clearly - she was alone in just a small flat and no family came around.

Looking back, I noticed after some time that she must have died as she as no longer on the front step every day - and I wished I had taken the time, the effort, the compassion to offer her more than just pleasantries, and that's why at Hamilton Hall, I offer so much to locals and non locals freely - as there are so many people living alone and lonely and if, like this poor girl above, something happens and they are not found in this case for 2 years - 2 LONG YEARS DEAD AND NOT A SOUL THOUGHT ABOUT HER, it does make you wonder.

For the first 5 years at Hamilton Hall we received a Christmas Card to Aunt Emily, and was signed by a whole family of different ages and always wishing her a Happy Christmas and New Year but the thing is - Hamilton Hall had been a Care Home for 10 years before I bought it and she was - I assume - one of the residents BUT Hamilton Hall had been CLOSED for 2 years prior to my buying it and then 5 years of cards still sent - and with no return address I could not inform them that their dear old Aunt Emily had either moved somewhere else - OR WAS DEAD - and they never took the time - except for sending a Christmas card, to check up and see how she was - so for at least 7 years - she was probably dead and that fact was unknown to her family.

So I assume she died with only the people around her here at Hamilton Hall and not a single family member could be bothered.

Tragic. An elderly women who was probably a sister, a wife, a mother, an aunt, and yet at the end of her life - she was abandoned by family - or at least what family there was, as someone to send a Christmas card to but that was the extent of their commitment.

She had lived through wars and depressions;- She may have voted for Harold Wilson and prior to that Winston Churchill for Prime Minister - She had lived with no central heating and probably limited hot water - no supermarkets and no indoor plumbing - and as a child, with no TV only radio. She had lived through the birth of rock'n'roll and Elvis - saw the Beatles and Doris Day - swooned over Rock Hudson and maybe even sang along to Vera Lynn - watched the Coronation of Queen Elizabeth with pride, and saw as the world changed with immigration in the 60's and 70's and how the UK changed. She was a part of that - had to have been as I am sure she wasn't living under a rock - and yet we know only her name and nothing else about her and sadly, missing her family, she probably died alone and had - clearly - no family member at her funeral - just the people she lived with at Hamilton Hall.

I was told about Peggy -another old lady who lived at Hamilton Hall in the 80's and 90's and died in the building aged 103 - and apparently was the life and soul, kept everyone on their toes, played Bridge beautifully and was a real character. Someone I would love to chat with today.

We are born alone ( but not me, I am a twin ) and we usually die alone - we come in and we go out - alone, and how we spend those days and years between the entrance and the exit is down to us and down to how we treat others and what we expect from others and if you cannot be bothered with the elderly - just remember one day VERY SOON you will be the one in need - and like me, I do regret not talking more with the old girl constantly asking for the time.

Many guests we have here live alone and are lonely. Not my story as I have been surrounded with people all my life and even when empty, there are 4 of us living here - Philip who is so thoughtful and kind, and Woody and his brother Gary are such sweet and caring friends and with Chris next door - we watch TV together, watch out for each other and CARE. Trouble is, so many people these days DO NOT CARE - and it's all about themselves.

So please watch out for those you feel may be vulnerable. Take notice, pay attention and offer something - anything - just so a lonely old person can feel there is someone watching out for them.

John Bellamy

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